Bottled Destruction

My life has turned off,
I’ve fallen so low
The pain that exceeds me,
is bottled below
So deep in my chest,
that my body will ache,
and shatter among me,
as my bones start to break

I’ve fallen to pieces,
my sobs never cease
The memories are forceful,
and hard to release

Too much destruction,
we've stumbled and crashed
Bleeding before you,
is my body you smashed

Blurry

Myself I am, I see so clear,
reflection of myself in a mirror
Same old image, all too plain,
feeling as if I'm going insane

Myself is waiting, I feel so weak,
Slowly heading towards the love I seek

Nothing left but shattered glass,
broken by my steady grasp
The pieces rose up from the floor,
A portal shown off like a door

In the mirror myself did go
Still like a painting, the river below
Quiet so loud it's piercing my ears,
the desire inside has brought me to tears

Searching for someone, I stare at the sun
Pointless I see this trip has become
I hear something out there, moving about
A figure in the distance, I can’t quite make out

Though vision is blurry, I don’t need to see,
I feel that he’s out there, waiting for me


Friday, June 12, 2009
- Dedicated to Tishawn.

Silent Tears

Betrayals light is upon me,
Why wont you set it free?
My tears will drown it out of you,
But you shed no tears for me

This deceit is worse than most,
One that cuts me deep
I am here and I am listening,
yet I'm silenced as you speak

The words you say turn into lies,
I can see there's much to teach
I try to squeeze it out of you,
But the truth is out of reach

This is what I get for believing
How did you get so cold?
How long have you been lying?
What stories have been untold?

If I am to be open,
then you must be open too
Don't break me into pieces,
I gave my heart to you

Wednesday, June 24, 2009


-- must have written this when I was with brad... I dont remember this one, but i found it and i liked it! :)

Dying Within

Left me alone,
the same as before
The memories we made,
you chose to ignore

Broken to pieces,
I’m hurting again
Feeling this way,
I’m dying within

Time heals most,
yet its going too slow
Not sure now,
which way i should go

Covered in sadness,
but I’ll keep it inside
To remind myself how,
it felt when u lied

--Thursday, June 25, 2009

“His Heavenly Heart”

I see who you are
when you look in my eyes,
your color is vibrant
in the darkest of skies

A heart so pure,
it shines in the light
In the heat of the day,
till it turns into night

A soul that’s complete,
so peaceful and still
like a vacant green meadow
or a wide grassy hill

Eyes that weaken
my body and soul,
and fill me with emotions
I cant quite control

Everything about him,
I keep inside
so the beauty within him,
he can not confide


- Dedicated To: John L.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Nothing But Pain

You tell me to trust you,
but I'm frightened inside
When I tell you my feelings,
you brush me aside

Behind this confusion,
I'm timid and down
Hoping that our future
will still be around

Each days a mystery,
am i happy or sad?
Can you ever forgive me?
Are you gonna stay mad?

I love you forever
I hope that explains
without your love,
there is nothing but pain

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Desert Of Hunger

Beating Of Hearts,
The Sun On The Sand
Warming Each Person,
As They Lend Out Their Hand

Free As The Wind,
As It Blows Dust Away
Left Fooled In The Desert,
Forever To Stay

Each Day Means Nothing,
You Gaze At The Sun
The Beauty Between Us,
Will Soon Be Undone

The Sun Is But Half,
You Will Never Be Whole
Warming Your Flesh,
As It Sucks Up Your Soul

Karma

You think that it's over,
that there's nothing to come,
but it's creeping beside you,
for you to succumb

You brainwash your victims,
till their judgment splits
Till they serve their purpose,
and you call acquits

The lies you shed out,
hurt all whose around
Till they unlock the chain,
that's tying them down

Its coming to get you,
there's no where to hide,
till deception and judgment,
commence to collide

Dedicated To: Bradlon

I Forgive You

My body is trembling,
as I lay in this bed
Soak up the tears,
that my body has bled

Whisper I'm special,
as you kiss on my ear
My vision is blank,
you're all I can hear

After all this,
I've awaken my heart
Here to be loved,
or taken apart

The heartache of life,
can turn you around
Break all that's inside you,
till you fall to the ground

But I choose to be,
the one who becomes,
the person whose forgiven,
all that you done

Dedicated to: Joel

Will You?

My head hangs low,
I'm trying not to cry
This hurt that surrounds me,
is bleeding me dry

I cant let you do this,
I wont let this be
A person I trusted,
has now set me free

You were my everything,
my sun in the sky
my life, it depends on you
and the warmth you supply

It used to be us,
but now its just me
I'm feeling your torture,
I cant let this be

The days have grown short,
my times running out
The life you've given me
I'll soon be without

Is it too late to save me?
Will the sun ever shine?
Did my words mean nothing?
Will you leave me behind?

Will you promise to love me
even though I must go,
as your light fades dimmer
and the moon is aglow?

As I’m sinking so deep,
and I’m falling apart
Will stop what your doing,
and kindle my heart?

Will you go back in time,
and rise once again?
will you stay away from darkness,
and let the sunlight seep in?

Written: Dec. 30, 2007

Waiting For You

Lady In Pain,
I See In Her Eyes
The Hurt From Within,
That She Tried To Disguise.

She Carries A Rose,
That's Covered With Grime
To Show That Some Beauty
Will Wilt Over Time

The Years Kept On Passing,
Her Blood Has Turned Cold
She Waits For His Spirit,
And Her Heart To Unfold

Sadly It's Over,
The Fact Is She Died
Just When Her Husband
Came Back For His Bride

All That She Wanted,
Was A Man She Could Touch
To Bring To Her Joy,
And A Heart She Can Clutch

Unwanted Feeling

Stuck In My Sadness,
There's Nothing To Gain
I Cry Out A River,
To Drain Out The Pain

My Flesh Is Still Burning,
Yet This Feelings So Cold,
I Lie In The Sunlight
With No One To Hold

Can't Seem To Find It
I Need To Belong
I'll Sit Here And Wait
For Love To Come Along

The Colors Have Gone

As I drift off to sleep,
There's a beat in my head
Of the clock that is ticking,
As I lay in my bed

I'm deep in my realm,
The hours pass by
Seeing no beauty,
And no warmth in the sky

No colors, no feelings,
Everything’s dead
Still, like the words
from the books i have read.


Still I'm in deep,
This dream is so bland
The people are kind,
but they don't understand

The blessing of color,
And what they all mean
Reveals the true knowledge,
Of how things are seen

Yet there's no color,
It's all black and white
This dream keep replaying,
When I sleep every night

Written: March 10, 2006

Dedicated To: The Giver

Strong

I feel so much stronger
I'm standing my ground
This confidence within me,
I finally have found

I don't care whose with me,
I'll watch as they go
I'll smile in the darkness,
My strengh I will show

I'm proud to be happy,
I'm glad that you're here
but if you too must leave me,
I won't shed a tear

I'll hold my head high,
I'll keep my mind stong
This feeling within me,
was here all along

The Dead End

I'm traveling down this path
The path of no return,
I must say it's kind of scary,
Not knowing which way to turn

It's like everybody’s running,
And I’m still standing here
Nobody wants to help me,
And this path just isn't clear

But then I come upon a place,
And I find this hard to grasp
Which path I want to walk among,
And the feelings that I must clasp

I'm afraid that if I do get lost,
That I’ll never make it through;
The hurt that life has brought to me,
And I don’t know what to do

Sometimes I think its over now
And my life keeps fading by
Both paths could lead to nothing
Not matter how hard i try

If in the end I’m left with nothing,
But one last breath inside
I will endure the life I had,
And know that I have tried

My Only Fear

My eyes turn blue,
they drip the blood
The pressure follows,
I drown the flood

I bring you closer,
I draw you in
I let out the water,
I’ve held within

I break into pieces,
I start to decay
I’m going down slowly,
I’m floating away

You’re bringing me closer,
I start to spin
The pressure keeps rising,
the water seeps in

Scared and helpless,
I start to let go
The waters torture,
Is rising below

Whirlpool keeps spinning,
over my head
Sinking down slowly,
the water turns red

Breaking on the inside,
and bleeding on the out
Come back and save me,
from the love I’m without

Lay me down slowly,
and burry my pain
Leave me with something,
my soul will obtain

Show me the light,
and fade out the dark
Set me a path,
I have to embark

Leave me with something,
and carry my heart
Take me beside you,
so our paths never part

One Love

You are my power,
the source of my pain
the heart that I’m keeping
the love I obtain

the tears on my pillow
the life in my eyes,
the cuts on my body
the hurt i despise

the things that you tell me,
I try to believe
this heartache behind me,
I can not relieve

unhand me these memories,
delete from my mind
cover me completely
so our love will align

Simple Steps

Cover your eyes,
cover your pain
bleed your emotions,
drip down the drain

constant confusion
can not ignore
take in its lesson
bleed out no more

beat out the anger
push in the heat
sweat off the lies
your trainings complete

Goddess Of Song

The Goddess of uncertainty,
will soon spread her wings
a shadow in the darkness,
so quiet as she sings

A voice so beautiful,
yet no one can hear
She's still in her darkness,
living in fear

A hope of one day,
meeting a new
a blessing of joy,
as so many do

yet as she is singing,
a presence of doubt
will build up within her,
that she can not take out

Only one can fix this,
but that one is stuck
trapped in her body,
as she runs a muck

She morns for her love,
that she is without
She reaches in the distance,
her arms stretch out

The presence around her,
will swallow her whole
unless she tries,
to admire her soul

The one she has,
within her own mind
the comfort of this,
she still has to find

The beauty within her,
always will glow
but the doubt inside,
she has to let go

Dedicated To: Stacey

Love

There’s something about love
that’s tough to explain
though you cant live without it,
it can drive you insane

but once you have trust
you'll open your mind
to find that theirs some things
you cant leave behind

so unlock the door,
or give me the key
for I’ve found my someone
whose just perfect for me.

Longing For You

Girl Of My Desire,
How I Long For Your Touch
They Way Her Lips Shine,
This Feelings Too Much

Her Lips Are Dark Red,
Each Eye Brews A Storm
Her Body Heat Surrounds Me,
This Feelings So Warm

I Watch Her Hair Blow
How It Shines In The Sun
Thinking Something’s Beginning,
When Really It's Done

Never To Touch Her,
She Will Never Be Mine
No I Can't Kiss Her,
Yet The Thought Is Divine

It's Alright

Relationships will come and pass,
But true love never dies
It takes some time to find the one,
But to rush it is unwise

Each time there comes a point to choose,
To move or let this lay
The time will pass, and you will see,
The price you have to pay

For now I say, just pick a path,
And let it grow on you
You know if it feels wrong inside,
There's one thing you can do

Tell the one you're with right now,
That this feeling isn't right
Just hold them close, and shut their eyes,
And tell them it's alright

Ice Box

My fingers are cold
My eyes are still wet
I think about you
and the first time we met.

I Cant fight this feeling
I cant change the past
I Feel like we're fading
Breaking Down Too Fast

I told you I loved you
You said that I lied
I Don’t Understand this
I'm trapped From inside

This Ice that surrounds me
is weighing me down
My teardrops will freeze
and fall to the ground

Unable to speak
As you brush me aside
in this state I'll remain
Broken inside

Dedicated To: Eddie

Heat Of The Moment

I’m so empty,
I’ve broken in two
This hurt I’m revealing,
is hard to construe

Ripped into pieces,
bloody and slashed
Silent and suffering,
from a heart you have smashed

Beat up and busted,
but with you I’m alive
Killing me softly,
but for now I survive

Can’t live without you,
I’ve fallen too soon
Infesting my veins,
although I am immune

Pulling me closer,
holding me down
Heartbeat to heartbeat,
there’s no one around

Passion provided,
movements and thrusts
Pleasing me softly,
as my body adjusts

The love and the laughter,
I’m holding inside
Together for always,
I’m right by your side.

Candle and Light

Lighter and candle,
the spark and its keeper
The love that they have,
is pulling them deeper

Deeper into a passionate state,
where candle and lighter
had much to create

Within a few weeks,
the fluid was gone
The one thing that
was keeping them strong

Lighter and candle,
together no more
What they had together,
they chose to ignore

So both are left empty,
candle and light
Hoping that one day,
again they'll ignite

Saturday, February 21, 2009

He Hurt Me

Have You Ever Felt So Hurt,
That Your Heart Shrinks From Tears?
As You Lay Awake Screaming,
Reenacting All Your Fears

Shaking And Nauseous,
You're Trying To Breathe
As You Keep Your Pain In,
While It's Trying To Leave

Trying To Hide It,
Only Shows More,
Kicking And Punching The Broken Down Door
Nothing Awakes The Deadness Inside,
Unless You Convince Your Heart That It Lied

Green Eyes

I'm afraid of what will come of her,
I'm trapped between her lies
I still can hear her voice
I can feel it when she cries

My baby needs attention,
I can see the things she hides
I came across the drugs,
and the pain that she abides

I know that when she yells,
It's only cause she's hurting
She tries to catch up to,
The love that she's deserting

I see the vibrant green,
When I look into her eyes
I hear her in the bathroom,
On the floor to where she cries

Finally I confront her,
While I hold her really tight
She tries to get away,
As she pulls with all her might

I kiss her cuts and bruises,
I'll lay with her tonight
She'll be my girl forever,
and I pray that she's alright

Written: Jan. 27, 2006

Forever Bleeding Out

The heart is breaking,
my mind is aching
The tears drain out,
as my body is shaking

The music is blaring,
the sun is still flaring
I put back together,
my life that you're tearing

You seem so uncaring,
there's nothing you're sharing
I can't let you near,
this heart I'm repairing

I follow, you're leading
Your thoughts I'm misreading
I see someone else,
down this path you're proceeding

This anger I'm constraining,
my mind is obtaining
In this state I'm remaining,
forever bleeding out

Goodnight

Last night I thought about you,
As the tears fell down my face
The pain and sorrow that hurt you,
Made my heart begin to race.

I think of how I'll miss you,
And how I want you here
But now you’re just a memory,
And that is what I fear

Last night I saw the blood,
Smeared all across your face
As thoughts race in my head,
Of a slightly better place

Maybe if you exist in me,
Then maybe I’ll believe
That you can restore what’s left of my heart,
So you'll never have to leave

Last night I prayed for you,
I hope you heard my prayer
I wish that I could hear you,
To let me know you're there.

I know your life was painful,
But you could have came to me
I need you in my life forever,
I don’t want to set you free

Last night I decided to keep you,
Each night I'll hug you tight
So the part of me that held you,
Can finally say goodnight.

Dedicated To: Alayana.

Departure Of Joy

Awaiting Thy Darkness
Eager To Find The Moon
Wanting Thy Darkness,
I Know Will Come Soon

Come Through My Pity,
And Into My Heart
Come Through My Pain,
And Rip It Apart

Anger Is Met,
Wanting Thy Darkness
Soon Sun Will Set,
Moon In The Darkness

Now Free From The Burning,
Free From Thy Heat
No One Is Out Here,
No One To Meet

Now In Thy Darkness
Now Is This Happy?
Cry For Thy Darkness,
For Happy It's Not

Cutting Me Deep

Slowly I'm fading,
my life you're invading
The love you're explaining,
is cutting me deep.

So much deceit,
my heart you mistreat
My life’s incomplete,
yet you tell me I'm wrong

Over and under,
I'm starting to wonder
Does love grow asunder?
Cause we're breaking in two

Tell me you love me,
and there's no one above me
Tonight when you hug me,
show me you care.

Can't Move On

When this music fills my head,
all the tears my heart has shed,
will kill the thoughts my mind has spread,
Within the time I'm in My bed

I can not take this anymore,
I heard you say this once before
There’s nothing here I can adore,
without the trust I'm waiting for

I close my eyes and start to pray,
for all these memories to go away

I want you here,
I want you gone
I can not take this
I can't move on.

Are You Alone?

Have You Ever Felt Lost,
Or Left Only With Tears?
As You Feel Your Eyes Turn Red,
With All The Hurt That Appears

Drowning In Your Pain,
As You Lie On The Floor
Gasping For Some Air,
With Both Hands On The Door

In This Tub Of Emotion
There's A Story That’s Untold
But The Heartache That's In It
Makes The Mind Uncontrolled

To Never Feel Love
Can Make You Insane
To Know It's Around You
And That It Can't Be Contained

And More And More People
Give Up On Their Life
You Know From Their Arms
That Where Carved With A Knife

But Why Do This Now,
When There's So Much To See
Why Think That Life's Over,
And Death Makes You Free?

Cause When You End Life,
Your Killing Your Soul
And The Soul Mate Who Needs It,
Will Never Be Whole

So Now Your Life’s Over
And Your Heart Became Cold,
Because You Choose The Short Path
That In Time Could Have Told,
This Feeling Of Love
That Now You Can't Hold,
Because It Died With Your Spirit
That Could Have Foretold,
The Knowledge You Learn
As Time Makes You Old

Written: May 1, 2005

My Darling Dee Dee

Oh My Darling Dee Dee,
How I Love Those Shimmering Eyes
I Know The Truth That Hides Within,
As The Trust Inside Me Dies

Just When I Think I'm Over You,
I Start To Hear Your Voice
You Said You Wouldn't Leave Me,
So Why'd You Make That Choice?

Oh My Darling Dee Dee,
I Need You By My Side
This Isn't Just Infatuation,
It's Love I Feel Inside

You Left Me Cold And Lonely,
With Pictures In My Head
Of Times I Watched You Sleep,
While Tucked Within My Bed

Oh My Darling Dee Dee,
The Time Has Come To Show
The Feelings That Lie Inside My Heart,
That I Never Will Let Go

With This Ring I Ask Of You,
To Come Back In My Life
To Have And Hold Forever,
And Be My Lovely Wife

Written: Jan. 24, 2006

Lift Me Up

Let Me Know When You Hear My Cries,
Maybe Then You'll Tell Me Your Lies
My Heart Dies From The Repeated Pain
The Reenactment Of My Endless Shame

If I Call To You Will You Answer Back?
Someone Being There Is Something I Lack
Sitting Alone On The Bathroom Floor,
Crying Out "Help Me, I Need More"
More Than Just The Frequent Pain
Sometimes I Just Go Insane

Wishing Someone Would Lend Out A Hand,
Lifting Me Off Of The Ground I Stand

Girl In The Snow

As Midnight Approaches This Silent Night,
A Girl Forms In The Snow
The Dark Blue Crystals In Her Eyes,
Will Swiftly Start To Glow


She's Living Among Our World Tonight,
But It Looks As If She's Dead
The Ice And Snow will Lift Around Her,
And Swirl Above Her Head

Beware The Girl With Dark Blue Eyes,
With A Heart Of Crumbled Coal
She Feeds On Us, The Human Life,
Then Takes Away Our Soul

Written: September 30, 2005

Hell Fire

The Fire It Dances,
Its Warmth On My Skin
The Danger Excites Me,
As My Resistance Grows Thin

My Interest Awakens,
Never To Die
The Fire It Flickers,
As Wind Passes By

The Girl In The Fire,
Seduces Me So
The Flames Lift Higher
As Watch From Below

Seeing Her Move,
Wanting Her Kiss
The Lust Of The Fire,
I Dance In Her Mist

Seduction Takes Over,
With It's Passion Of Lust
The Heat Of The Fire,
Decays Into Dust

Written: October 22, 2005

Dream World

Close My Eyes,
I Enter The Sun
Feeling Free For Once In My Life,
The Sadness Is Done

But As Soon As I Wake,
The Dream World Has Died,
All Of My Sadness Was Shoved Back Inside
Quickly Annoyed,
I Sprang From My Bed
Visions Of Dream World Surpassed In My Head

Cant Hold The Anger,
I Punched The Nearest Wall
My Hand Started Swelling,
I Ran Down The Hall

Collapsed On The Ground,
I Shouted In Pain
Still Each Day Is Always The Same
After The New Day Ended,
I Walk Back To Bed
To Go To The Dream World That Lives In My Head

Growth

Can Someone Please Tell Me
What I Should Do
To Make People Love Me,
The Way They Love You

I Know I'm Not Good Enough,
To Be All That You Need
Craving That Exotic Flower,
Though I'm Just A Seed

I Know When I'm With You,
It's Like I'm Not There
Lowering My Confidence,
That Alone I Can't Bare

But One Day I'll Grow
And Your Flower Will Wilt
So Then I'll Be Beautiful,
And You're Left With The Guilt

Written: May 22, 2005

Alone At Night

I walk through the fog on this one dreadful night,
spite and deception is all that’s in sight
Through all the mirrors that replicate my reflection,
feeling the heartache of hopeless perfection

I sit on a rock near a wide stream,
wondering if this is all just a dream
I look at the ground and see heavy soil,
remembering all the pain and turmoil.

Why is this pain all I can see?
Why wont these feelings just let me be?
Why am I haunted by peoples mistakes,
people that die in rivers and lakes.

Fix My Heart

Lost a life again
All mans heads are bowed
Tell me is it a sin,
Or is it just allowed?

People find a way,
to hurt each other every single day.

Why do you hurt my soul, hurt my heart?
When we could just pull through, it’s your start.
To a new better life, leave the dark.
You have to move on through, fix my heart.

My Minds Voice

A voice from the inside,
Has called out my name
The sorrow in her voice,
Was spoken in shame

She knows what could happen,
As she lends out her heart
The trust she has shown me,
Must not fade apart

I must bring her treasure,
To a man who will find
That true love is kept,
In the depths of your mind

So that no one can crush it,
Or snap it in two
I need to protect it,
So love will shine through

Noble Intentions

Near the blood sucking winds,
far beyond the raging seas.
A terror of endless light openly arose from beneath my knees.
Five beams of light all fled through the sky.
Lifting the people up each passing me by.

My skins starts peeling.
I slowly arose.
Dazed in a trance,
I'm completely composed.

Deadly distorted images produce in my mind.
Each one of them crawling, none left behind.
Awake to reality, I lay on the ground.
Every bounded volume made little or no sound.

Something in front of me blew dust in my eye.
It's thick white smoke streamed slowly near by.
I understand now what I must do.
Each image was clear I must pull through.

Gravity's pushing down,
My legs turned to stone.
Striving to move faster,
breaking my bone.

The thoughts of agony swerved through my brain
Making my nerves send nothing but pain.
My noble intentions, were gone in a flash.
All of my wisdom turned into ash.

Not every person has a true noble deed.
As you can see, some don’t succeed.
But at least you know your tried your best.
That alone put you to rest.

Take My Heart

Past Experiences Linger
The Feeling Of Hope Collides
Our Body Heat Is Like The Sun
The Passion Of Lust Subsides

Images Of Us, Happy With Life
Me And Him Together Was Nothing But Right

Now In The Dark, Sadness Arose
What Once Was Love Was Now Decomposed

Lies That You Passed, The Hope That I Grasped
The Love That We Shared, You Said That You Cared
But You Didn't Care, You Were Unfair
You Took My Heart, Your Love Wasn't There

The Darkness

All that surrounds me is suffering me slow,
I see as the love, the happiness goes
Now all I see has trapped me within
Oozing and dripping, fall away from my skin

A creak from the quiet doors, the windows slam shut
Feeling the pain, a deepening cut
I see a girl gasping, straining for air
She's there in the darkness as I sit and stare
I see the clear drops as they form in her eyes,
To drip to bleed as they give out their cries
I look for the answer, yearning to find,
The reason she's trapped there, alone in her mind

Then it all disappeared, everything was okay
I awoke from the dream, it all went away
I turned off the light, and crawled in my bed,
To return to the darkness that resides in my head

The Dark Road

Each day you make a wish
trying your best to swallow,
that dreams can come true,
to bring a path to follow

It's roads are paved in black,
You're blinded by the night
Unsure what lies ahead,
but prepared to face a fight

If dreams are what you seek,
and you need them to surpass
nothing stands in your way,
and the heartache's in the past

Sometimes you doubt the chance,
that hope can get us through
yet still you keep on wishing,
to make your dreams come true

Just when you think it's over,
and there's nothing left to face
you realize that you did it,
and your pain has been erased

Written: August 13, 2005

The Red Rose

My Heart Is A Rose
That Peels When Neglected,
But Blooms When It Feels Like It Has Been Accepted

The Thorns That Surround It,
Are Knives Through My Heart
You Can't Bear To Touch Them,
Or It Might Break Apart

When The Rain Falls Down,
I Feel Like My Soul Has Been Lifted
As My Mind Seems To Grow,
When The Pain Has Been Shifted

Nothing Is Strong Enough To Pull Out The Pain,
So Give Me A Love That My Heart Will Contain

What Is Beauty?

One night I closed my eyes,
but somehow I still could see
I treasure this life inside my heart,
that I know I must set free

My eyes did not once blink,
everything was so clear
A figure from a distance,
I know will soon appear

To some he seems so beautiful
How could anything be so pure?
The fragrance of his body,
and his soul I did allure

But others are scared to face,
what most of us call ugly
As your body begins to chase
the message you must unfold

The nights you sat in wonder,
can help us solve this case
As you try to work through the knots,
at a slow and steady pace

The day I fell asleep,
could be my real life in disguise
Into this room I creep,
before the pain hath but arise

Soon I will wake up,
and I’ll have to let him go
But this life is not worth living,
covered deep under the snow

So once I am released,
I will come back again
To fulfill this life inside me,
and relieve the pain I’m in

Springtime Fun

Spring time again,

the flowers in bloom

The winds blow the scent,

of a potent perfume


No time for studies,

no essays, just fun

Warming your back,

are the rays from the sun


Children all around,

gather at to play

Until the light from the morn,

had faded away


Springtime is over

such a short break we get,

but the joy that it brought us

we wont soon forget


Now back to classes

and homework to do

With new information

we have to review


With teachers and students,

pencils and pens,

With each day that passes,

A new day begins


Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Time

In The Blink Of An Eye,
The Time Goes By
People Get Older,
People They Die

The Mind Gets Wiser,
Your Heart Beats Fast
The Tears Fall Down,
As Each Day Drifts Past

In The Blink Of An Eye
Knowledge Is Seen
We're Left With The Question,
What Does Life Mean?

Still Can't Explain,
Why People Show Fear
Why We Have Feelings,
For Ones Who Are Near

In The Blink Of An Eye,
Love Became Lust
Sex Became Pleasure,
Which Now Is A Must

But If I Could Go Back
I'd Go To A Time,
Where Love Was Once Cherished,
And The Heart Was Sublime

Written: Jan. 10, 2006

This Pain

As My Mind Unfolds The Truth,
Of What Has Come About
The Sadness Begins To Rise,
From The Love I'm Left Without

Again The Tables Turned,
And I Am Left To Meet
The Shadow I've Become,
That I Hope I Soon Can Beat

My Anger Has Left Me Dry,
As My Pity Takes A hold
Though I Try My Best To Fight It,
The Pain Still Leaves Me Cold

I Know When I Let Go,
The Pain Will Stay Within
Till I Am Swamped With Nothing,
But The Hurt I Have To Mend

With Each Time That This Happens,
My Mind Will Start To Strain
By Holding In Each Memory,
Of When I Felt This Pain.

The Final Goodbye

Out in the snow,
freezing within
So cold outside,
she's clutching her skin
She cries out a tear,
it turns into ice

With every drop fallen,
takes more of her life
No shelter for miles,
she's sentenced to die
Exhaling the breath of her final goodbye

A Choice For Salvation

I put you before myself,
you selfish little boy
You tell me that you love me
yet, I'm treated like a toy

You play with my emotions,
you must like it when I cry
I drain out all my tears for you,
so much, that I've run dry

I know you're so much smarter,
than you lead me to believe
You fool me into thinking,
that my heart you cant deceive

But time has left me swollen,
as I'm standing in this place
I need someone to shield me,
from this pain I have to face

Again, you've pulled me under
and I try to make it through
As I'm reaching for the surface,
of my life I must subdue

So now that I am left here,
with this choice I have to make
Should I let my heart grow thinner,
or cope with a heart that I might break?

-Dedicated to Bradlon

Too Far Away

The Dreams Tend To Haunt Me,
In The Back Of My Mind
I Clench My Head Tightly,
As My Thoughts Start To Wind

Never Can Catch Her,
She's Too Far Ahead
Tears On My Eyelids,
As I Lay In My Bed

I Reach Out To Hold Her,
But She Never Reached Back
The Love That She Gave Me,
Is The One Thing I Lack

I See Her From A Distance,
I Long For Her Touch
My Hearts Beating Faster,
This Heartache's Too Much

One Day I'll Catch Her,
She'll Sit By My Side
Her Hand On My Shoulder,
With Her Heart As My Guide

Feathered Wings

Navy blue feathered wings,
sweetly chirping little things.
Baby birdy swooping low,
on a perch this bird did go.

Birdy doubts its pretty wings,
doesn't like the way it sings
Birdy feels all alone,
doesn't really have a home.

Off the perch the bird did fly,
passing cars and she flew by.
Speeding car was coming fast,
on the windshield the birdy crashed.

Pretty bird has lost her wings,
slowly realized what this means
doubt can dig a deep dark hole,
in the beauty that lies within your soul.

-Dedicated To: Karla.

Mirror Of Choices

I look at the mirror and see my reflection,
seeing the side of hate and deception
I look in my eyes and see all my sorrow,
wishing that there was someone else’s to borrow
One half of me is standing quite well,
the other half seems to sit there and dwell
Indicating that there is need for attention,
hoping to scare away my life’s apprehension


The way I see it, the mirror has two paths,
choosing the wrong one will fill it with cracks
Though people might know which one to choose,
the decision you make might break it in two

Shifting Sky 2

Gray sky shifted into blue,
no more sorrow to get through
Heavy heart has lost its weight,
blue eyes faded, no more hate

Slowly breaking all around,
it found another to bring down
Darkness spreading, heavy heart
her whole world has fell apart

All this happened cause of you,
blue eyes shifted to someone new.

Shifting Sky

Darkness spreading
seeping by,
Hungry souls
will leave him dry

Blue sky shifting into gray,
make his torment go away

Slowly breaking,
shutting down,
full of pressure all around

Stuck within a troubled past,
hope of love is fading fast

Eyes stay full of frequent pain,
broken promises still remain

Living with a hungry heart,
can not let it come apart

The smile that you will try to fake,
can leave you numb while your awake
While true love comes to those you know,
and leaves you stuck under the snow

Blue eyes cry out one last tear,
no more sorrow will appear

Nothing's standing in the way,
make your darkness go away

Dedicated To: John

Pretty

perfect angel, pretty, pure
loved someone for that I'm sure
pretty promptly pampered him
put up with the lie she's in

tells herself that she's okay,
she can not make this go away
pretty pushed herself inside,
many tears that she has cried
plastic person loving him,
his cruel game she can not win

Pretty piled heavy bricks,
burdens from the man shes with
so much pressure piled high
shocking how she's getting by
pretty lives her life for him,
so much that her lights gone dim

herself glowing, gone for good
until he treats her like he should
treat yourself as he should treat,
and your self love is then complete

Love Wasn't There

My heart is gone; it washed away,
into a world of dark and gray.
I wanted to stay away from my heart
Leaving it there,
It all broke apart.

Wondering why I left it to lay.
It still sat there, fading away.
Without my love was nothing but sadness,
trying to break though the thought of my madness.
I came to my heart, nothing was there.
It was all gone without me,
Love wasn't there.

Before you.

Before you,

all alone

My future life,

was unknown



Saw nothing left,

ahead of me

Closed off, so the world can't see

how torn down I could be,

from all the things he did to me



But now I see something new,

a special person to help me through,

the hurt that I must now undo,

before my body breaks in two



It's not to late,

I see anew

An open door I'm walking through,

A second chance, to renew

An open path to pursue

A better view,

because of you

Healed

We all have a chance,
to get what we need
To seek what is out there,
for a way to succeed

I know what I long for,
I see him in dreams
I feel that he loves me,
or that’s what it seems

Try to imagine if you went to fight,
would you been with him,
would it turn out right?

He took the pieces
from body and soul,
and placed them back gently
so I could be whole

So now I am fighting
and maybe he'll see,
that true loves comes once,
and its coming from me

Autumn Leaves

Leaves are falling

more each day

never stopping,

as they sway



Seasons pass

so do we,

our true love can never be



Always watching,

searching for

the one I love,

and nothing more



Months and months

have come to pass,

my heart's last beat,

is coming fast



Beauty stays

waiting for,

one true person

I adore



Left me crying,

all alone

Leaves are falling,

on their own



Come and save me

take me back

Leave me with my heart intact.



Hold me closely,

feel the kiss

of one true love,

that does exist


Dedicated To: Eddie